Parents Article for Preteen Stress

by JMoorE_8900_nh2024 | Dec 18, 2024 | Family, Parenting

Value Builders International

Addressing the Anxiety and Depression Epidemic in Preteens: A Guide for Parents

In recent years, more and more preteens are experiencing anxiety and depression. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), nearly 15% of children ages 10-14 have reported experiencing depression symptoms, while anxiety disorders impact roughly 32% of teens and preteens (CDC, 2022). This trend is concerning for parents, and the effects are deeply felt by families everywhere. But it’s important to remember that anxiety and depression are often symptoms of a deeper issue that needs to be explored rather than only managed with medication or temporary solutions.

As parents, you play a crucial role in understanding and helping your preteen navigate these difficult feelings, and often, faith can be a guiding light in these discussions. Let’s explore what might be causing this rise in anxiety and depression, why it’s so important to get to the heart of the issue, and how you can be a powerful support for your child.

Understanding Anxiety and Depression as Symptoms, Not Just Conditions

While anxiety and depression are often viewed as standalone mental health conditions, they’re usually signs of something deeper. It’s a bit like a fire alarm going off to warn us of smoke and flames somewhere else in the house. The anxiety or depression your child feels could be a signal that something is out of alignment or unresolved in their life.

Some researchers point to the effects of technology, social media, and high academic pressures as contributors to these rising rates of anxiety and depression in preteens (American Psychological Association, 2021). However, these influences don’t fully explain why kids are struggling. Sometimes, these symptoms are indicators that your child is wrestling with questions about their purpose, values, or identity. And in many cases, they may feel tension between what they know in their heart to be right and the messages or pressures they experience from the world around them.

Good Anxiety: Recognizing When It’s a God-Given Alarm

It’s essential to remember that not all anxiety is necessarily “bad.” Sometimes, anxiety arises because your child’s inner purpose or God-given values are clashing with what they’re encountering around them. This kind of “good anxiety” is their heart’s way of saying, “This isn’t right for me” or “I don’t feel comfortable here.”

You might share with your child that the Bible teaches us to “not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind” (Romans 12:2). This means that feeling uneasy in certain situations can actually be a sign that God is guiding them toward something more in line with His purpose. Helping your preteen learn to recognize this kind of discomfort as a positive nudge can allow them to trust their inner compass, rather than feeling overwhelmed by anxiety or guilt.

Encourage your preteen to listen to these signals and share any concerns or questions they have with you. Let them know it’s okay to feel different or to stand apart when something doesn’t feel right.

Why Medication Alone Often Misses the Deeper Issues

In today’s medical field, medication is frequently used to treat anxiety and depression, and while it can sometimes help, it often only addresses the symptoms rather than the deeper underlying issues. According to the National Institutes of Health, an estimated 40% of children and adolescents diagnosed with anxiety and depression are prescribed medications (NIH, 2021). Medication can help manage symptoms, but it doesn’t necessarily address why your child is feeling this way in the first place.

Anxiety and depression are often rooted in emotional, social, or spiritual struggles that need attention. Relying solely on medication can sometimes mask these issues instead of encouraging preteens to explore what’s really going on. It’s like putting a bandage on a wound without treating the cause. While medication can be helpful in certain situations, finding the deeper cause—through open conversations, counseling, and spiritual guidance—is essential to true healing.

Parents as the Front Line of Defense: Opening Communication and Support

As a parent, you’re in the best position to help your child get to the root of what they’re experiencing. Children who feel comfortable talking to their parents about difficult emotions tend to experience lower levels of stress and anxiety. According to a survey conducted by the Journal of Family Psychology, teens and preteens who have open communication with their parents are 30% less likely to develop anxiety and depression symptoms (Journal of Family Psychology, 2022).

Talking to your preteen about their feelings, fears, and experiences might feel difficult at first, but here are some simple steps that can make these conversations more effective:

Create a Safe Space: Make sure your child knows they can talk to you about anything without fear of judgment or punishment. Start by saying, “You can tell me anything, and I’m here to listen.” This can help them feel more comfortable opening up.
Listen Without Interruption: Sometimes, preteens just need someone to listen. You don’t need to solve the problem immediately. Often, they simply want to be heard and understood.
Validate Their Feelings: Let your child know that what they’re feeling is okay. You might say, “It’s normal to feel anxious sometimes, and it doesn’t make you weak or bad. Let’s work through this together.”
Guide Them to Self-Reflection: Encourage your child to explore why they’re feeling a certain way. You might ask, “What do you think is causing these feelings? Are there any situations or pressures making you feel uncomfortable?” Helping them understand the reasons behind their emotions can give them a sense of control.
Bring Faith into the Conversation: Encourage your child to see that they are loved by God and have a unique purpose. Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Remind them that even in difficult times, they’re not alone.
Encourage Positive Activities: Help your child find activities that bring them joy and a sense of purpose. Participating in a youth group, volunteering, or taking up a creative hobby can help them build confidence and find meaning in their day-to-day life.

Suggested Steps for Parents to Address Anxiety and Depression

When addressing anxiety and depression with your preteen, consider these steps to foster understanding, healing, and resilience:

Seek Counseling with a Holistic Approach: Look for a counselor who values getting to the root of emotions rather than only treating the symptoms. Family or faith-based counseling can offer support that aligns with your family’s values.
Limit Exposure to Stressful Influences: Help your child reduce screen time, limit social media, and manage their academic workload. Studies show that teens who spend more than three hours a day on social media are more likely to experience mental health challenges (American Psychological Association, 2021).
Encourage Physical Activity: Physical activity is known to reduce anxiety and improve mood. Even a daily walk or fun activities like bike riding can help your preteen manage stress.
Model Self-Care and Faith: Show your child how you manage stress and anxiety by taking time for prayer, reflection, and gratitude. Your actions will help them understand that faith and self-care can be powerful tools.

Embracing Faith and Family as Support

Your preteen’s journey through anxiety and depression can be tough, but they don’t have to go through it alone. Faith can be a powerful source of strength, providing them with hope, purpose, and a sense of belonging. By talking openly, validating their feelings, and encouraging a deeper look at their emotions, you’re helping your child grow resilient in ways that will benefit them for a lifetime.

Remember, God has plans for your child, plans for good and not for harm, as Jeremiah 29:11 reminds us. With your support and guidance, your child can learn to face anxiety and depression as part of a bigger picture—one filled with hope, purpose, and the love of family and faith.

References

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2022). Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance – United States. Retrieved from https://cdc.gov
National Institutes of Health. (2021). Pediatric Mental Health and Medication Statistics. Retrieved from https://nih.gov
American Psychological Association. (2021). Social Media and Youth Mental Health. Retrieved from https://apa.org
Journal of Family Psychology. (2022). Parent-Child Communication and Mental Health Resilience in Adolescents. Retrieved from https://apa.org